thaumaturgy

hmmm.. its a belaboured point about the fact that when we grow up, we lose something.

a very important something.
but can we really help that?

i am talking about the magic that we see as a child.
the magic that transforms any kind of running into that of 'the flash'. jumping on the bed into scaling skyscrapers. G.I.Joe into rootin' tootin' sharpshootin' heroes. where one can move between castles and deserts, dungeons and landscapes in the blink of an eye. all the playacting, all the imagination that we have as a child. where anything seems possible. where everyone is willing to play along with your fantasy that you are indeed robin hood.

and yet, at 22, if i pretend that my room is actually the secret lair of dr. doom, i'll probably be taken to the mental asylum. if not repriminded severely. or even worse, laughed at.
and hence we are forced to shift that beautiful anything-is-possible world to our dreams. to our inner mind.
basically, as we grow older, we are not allowed to play.
which is probably why we like to be with kids. we can relive those times so easily, and no-one is there to forbid us.
that is so sad.

after seeing 'the matrix' for the first time, i would enact the slow motion fights. however, this had to be done behind closed doors, far from the madding crowd. who in all probability would have called me mad.
mad, maybe. but i preferred this form of madness to the madness of being called 'grown-up'.
am i just running from my responsibilities ? from growing up ?
i don't know.

there is a scene in 'finding neverland', where Barrie tells one of the children that in the last 30 seconds he's grown up. that the boy has disappeared.
he hates that.

i hate it too. i hate being told that i have to grow up. big deal if i have to, but that does not mean that i have to lose being a child. that i have to lose my imagination. when anything is possible.
i know that its not neccessary to lose anything when one grows up. but thats the way we make it.
“you can't do that until you're older.” “when you're older, you'll understand and won't do it again.” “grow up!”
and so on.

must we really convince children that growing up is so much fun ? that growing up means that you can experience so many more things than as a child. i remember feeling more than once that i should grow up.
luckily, various experiences showed me that i needn't. and saved, at least in part, my childhood in me.

how do i know this ? yesterday, when walking home in the gale that weirdly seemed to start up as i left college, i started fighting the wind demon. the one who was trying to vanquish me, zamman, the last hero left on earth.

man… that was fun.

Inspired by: 'Finding Neverland'